I received a message on Instagram that I want to share with readers because it brought up topics that I feel are important to talk about. I also plan on sharing about this on my podcast Trich Talks! in the future. I am in no way offended or angry at the person who messaged me—the benefits of having this conversation is what is most important to me.
When I first received this message I wasn't upset or hurt by their words. I understand that by creating content about my personal experience with trichotillomania for anyone to see, that some people won't like it! That's the name of the game! Instead, my thoughts instantly jumped to, We are on very different parts of the journey.
The version of me the internet sees is someone who is incredibly healed but I wasn't always that way. I struggled intensely with my trichotillomania and was in a state of deep despair for most of my life with it! It took a lot of work to get to this healed version of myself but by watching a 10 second video, you wouldn't know that. I wouldn't expect anyone to. That's why it is so important to me to share all aspects of my story through my books, my podcast, interviews, blog posts, and of course, social media posts.
Having a positive relationship with my disorder wasn't easy!
So you might be thinking, Well... How did you respond? Did you respond? And the answer is yes, I did.
I felt it was important to question some of their points while also sharing that I relate to how they felt. I know how brutal this disorder can be on us because I've lived it myself—I just didn't continue living in a world where my trichotillomania brought me only pain. I made some big changes.
Acceptance doesn't mean giving up!
I've learned that some people view accepting their trichotillomania as giving up. It kind of sounds like it, I guess? I don't really know why people view it that way. Is it because to them, accepting that they have it may lead to the thought process: I can pull as much as I want for as long as I want and who cares? But that isn't true for those who have accepted it. At least those who I've spoken to or interviewed on my podcast.
Instead, the people that have accepted it as a part of their life have learned more effective management strategies than before when their goal was to be "pull-free." It opened the door for other things too like community and self-love.
When I began accepting my trichotillomania as a part of my life I began letting go of the shame surrounding it.
I wasn't going to let trichotillomania continue to make me feel bad about myself. It sure didn't help me stop pulling so why would I continue?
I wish nothing but the best to the person who messaged me, and if you're in their shoes, please know you are not alone. Everyone's journey looks different. We are all constantly learning and growing—you don't have to be stuck where you currently are. One small step at a time leads to great places.
Comments